YIKES

Can you believe it's been almost a year since i've been on this thing? I mean i guess i can with all of the new things out there. I went to Live Journal for a while and then yeah i got hooked on the stupid MySpace train.  I guess i should start coming back here because i don't think that anyone i know reads these and i could totally let loose about EVERYTHING and EVERYONE. Maybe that is what i'll do.

School was good for the fall....this winter SUCKED. Life is going alright.  In October i had a feeding tube put in my stomach.  It sits in the middle of my upper abs. A few inches below the breast bone.  It was about 7-8 inches long.  Had that until February when i got a "button" put in it's place and this one sticks out less than a 1/4 of an inch. I do feedings at night....so i eat all day long and while i'm sleeping i pump in food....it's kinda cool i guess.  I am back up to about 110lbs so far.  It's not as much as i would like but it's a start i suppose.  I had my appendix out a week after my button went in and then i went to Tennessee for Spring Break 3 days later. I'm a trooper i guess. The appendix thing had me in the hospital for one night. I went to the ER at 7am on a Monday and had surgery at 8pm and went home by noon on tuesday. It was great. *lol* everyone was shocked. I love when i do that to people.

Love life is still entacted.  We've hit a few bumps in this road of love but it hasn't been anywhere near as badly as i thought it would have turned out by now.  It's been slightly under two years.  July 4th will be the big 2 year mark for us.  We're happy and healthy at the moment and things are going pretty swell.  I've had a few temptations lately.  It seems like when you're with someone, everyone else wants to be with you too.  I have had a manager at work try to get with me, a classmate, and a guy that my dad introduced to me.  It's been kinda hard sometimes because they always seem to be around on the days that i'm really depressed or mad or something.  Depression is a new thing for me lately.  I really let out a comment the other day to a good friend of mine that i really wish i wouldn't have let out......but i put it out there and realized that that was really how i felt.....i'm not quite sure what i'm going to do with myself right now. Things are getting pretty crazy and it's all inside my head.

Ok i just caught a block so i'm going to have to go before i ramble and make no sense.  Even though no one will read this anyways. It's nice to know that i have somewhere to vent....in writing form.

Currently Listening Extreme Behavior By Hinder see related

- Better Than Me

This Freakin Blows.....

So Friday i went to the doctor's again....Children's Hospital to be exact for a check up of my Cystic Fibrosis.....and while there i find out that my life is totally and completely falling apart right before my eyes.  Besides everyone getting annoyed with me and aggrevated with me and trying to start fights with me and stuff.....i am slowing declinging in health.  Basically i was told that my weight loss is NOT my fault.  I lost the 1.5 lbs that i had gained and am now down to 103....it makes me fucking sick to look in the mirror....i try not to look at myself too often because honestly i have become totally ugly.  I would  kill to put on about 20 lbs right now.  So yeah i guess some people may be happy for this....in short if we don't take care of this soon i'm going to get really sick and slowly decline.....so what are they suggesting now?  Since i had tried to eat everything they want me to....i've increased my caloric intake to almost 4000 calories aday....i've tried all their add-ins and extra meals and shakes and i STILL can't put on the weight.  So now they want to put a G-Tube into my stomach.  Basically it's a feeding tube that i will have to hook supplements up to at night while i sleep and that way i will get an extra 1500-2500 calories a night and not burn them off (because i am so active) so i should gain my weight back in a few months.  I will have a small "button" on my stomach...which is where the end of the tube sticks out.  The surgery to place this tube in will require a 3 day stay in the hospital...but 3 days is a walk in the park compared to some of my stays.  So this is something that is really really huge for me to decide....i have so many ?s i need answers to first...but let me tell you this is going to be one test of my character, of love, and of friendship that i am desperatly going to have to be prepared for....my life is going to change alot in the next few months...but maybe i'll finally be able to decide who i am and who i need around me....this may turn into a good thing...who knows.

-Later Dayz-

  Tiny

WOW....can you believe how long it's been since i've been on here?  MySpace and LiveJournal have totally taken over the scene for everyone these days.  Fads.....geeze! Anyways i know most you don't care but i figured i'd wast time that i should be using for homework to update.

My health is on the rise....not 100% better but getting closer each day.  I'm still on some oral antibiotics and i can't seem to gain my weight back but i feel better at least.  Im at a scrawny 104lbs. when i was at a healthy, toned 126lbs.  I'm supposed to add 1000 calories to my diet a day.  It sucks but it's life.

My family is ok i suppose.  Something i really don't feel like going into.  The past couple months have been really hard to deal with.  But the issues have been resolved for about 3 weeks now.  Not sure what to do.

Friends are great.....except i miss Chrischelle tons and haven't been able to hang out with her cuz i was in the hospital when she was home.  I ask Sandra about her all the time.  I hung out with Jenny Taylor last night.  It was a BLAST.  We went to our old hang out at GREAT SKATE.  It was Jenny, her bro, me, Shawn and his little sister.  After Great Skate we dropped off his little sister and went to see Jenny's Josh who was working.  Then Jenny, her bro, me and Shawn went to Steak n Shake.  It was so much fun....i love you girlie.  

Yes Shawn and i are still together....working on 8 months. (Go Me) *lol* i love him with everything i am.   Shawn's brother just got engaged so congrats to Aaron and Sarah. Our Valentine's Day was untraditional but tons of fun.  We went bowling and just hung out together all day.  It was nice to just be with him for a little peace and quiet, something we don't get much of.    He's been going through alot of shit right now, and i'm just going along for the ride.

Anyways i guess i'll get to my homework i have a math test monday that i'm totally unprepared for.  So later gators

-Later Dayz-

Dear Loyal Fans-

     *lol* who am i kidding?  I have no readers on here.  But i'm bored as hell and i've checked all of my e-mail accounts...including Shawn's over 3 times already....and put more than one update on my LJ. 

    As at least one of you know....i am once again spending time in Detroit.  I am enjoying a wonderful 2 week all expense paid vacation at the wonderful Children's Hospital of Michigan....yes that's right folks.....since last Tuesday i have been in room 636 of the hospital and i will be here until next tuesday at the earliest.  I was sick for a while and lost 20 lbs so they decided at my last check up here to admit me.  I was hopefully going to go home on the meds but the first night they gave it to me i had an allergic reaction to it and couldn't breathe and turned all red and got dizzy and broke out in hives (spelling?) so they have to keep me for the full 2 weeks that the medicine needs so that they can give me Benedryl (sp?) through my IV before they give the meds so it doesn't happen again. So it'a been a fun stay.  Alot has gone askew here but i'll be fine.

    Hoping to go to Monster Jam next weekend as long as i'm out of here by then.  It should be fun.  Goin with my baby, Katie, and Aaron (her guy friend).  And yes i said my baby....meaning Shawn and i are still going strong...almost 6 months now.  He was the first guy i've ever REALLY spent Christmas with.  I got him some shoes he wanted and i got him a ring earlier.  He got me a gorgeous ring and a movie that i've been wanting to see (Cry Wolf).  It was great.  I got to leave the hospital and go home for that day but i had to be back for my meds.  I'm going home tomorrow and getting a hair cut.....going to be TOTALLY different than usual....can't wait!!!!!  Right now i'm waiting for my meds to finish so i can go to bed....i got about 20 minutes left.  It takes 2 hours.

   Anywho i guess that's all for now.  Feel free to comment or call me but i have my mom's cell so the # is 260-3513.  Talk to you all later....

Later Dayz-

  Tina

Hope Everyone had a great thanksgiving...mine was really busy but tons of fun....i am procrastinating right now and not doing homework like i should be since i'm a little behind from my surgery.....so yeah i guess i'll get to that plus a bizzillion people are trying to talk to me right now...more later?